Do You Suffer from Metsfanitus? Here’s How to Deal with the Pain of Watching the Mets

Warning: if you’re a Mets fan, you’re not going to like this post. We’re all sick – and it’s called being a Mets fan. It’s characterized by rooting for a team destined to lose and side effects include putting millions of dollars into owner’s pockets – owners who have no right owning a major league franchise to begin with. All cases point to there being no cure.

metsfanitusMetsfanitus – as it’s officially called – wouldn’t be so bad if it weren’t for the constant pain, day in and day out. The pain sometimes is excruciating during the baseball season and also hits hard in the off season when nothing good ever seems to happen to give fans hope for the future.

it’s painful to watch the bullpen implode game after game. It’s painful to watch Dillon Gee pitch to a 6 run line every game. It’s painful to watch David Wright come up short in clutch situations. It’s painful to watch ground balls go right through Ruben Tejada’s legs. It’s painful to watch Ike Davis strikeout and blame it on the umpire. It’s painful to watch Daniel Murphy pop up to the infield with a runner on third and one out. It’s painful to watch Jordany Valdespin do stupid things on the basepaths. It’s painful to watch Lucas Duda swing through fastballs right down the middle of the plate. It’s painful to watch Marlon Byrd try to work a count. It’s painful to watch any starter other than Harvey or Niese take the mound. It’s painful to watch when any reliever enters the game. It’s painful to look into the dugout and see Terry Collins making bonehead strategical moves. It’s painful to see Dan Warthen in the dugout to begin with. It’s painful to listen to the team’s owners talk about their “strong” financial standing. It’s painful to watch Bobby Parnell blow saves. It’s painful to see Justin Turner come off the bench as the team’s best pinch hitter. It’s painful to watch Mike Baxter play the outfield. And it’s painful to watch Collin Cowgill play period.

Due to Metsfanitus, many Mets fans that watch TV, listen to the radio, and read all the feel-good propaganda articles from fan blog sites and even the very sites the Mets run and sponsor find themeselves getting increasingly angry, upset and frustrated – to the point of pulling out their hair over how bad the Mets really are. The pain is caused mainly because they all believe all the crap that’s feed to them such as the Mets aren’t that bad and are heading in the right direction to compete in 2014 and beyond.

However, all of us at sleep well at night. Why? It’s because we’ve objectively studied the entire Mets predicament and come to the table with low expectations. We understand who the Mets really are. We expect the pain. We expect futility from this team. And when you expect the pain, and expect to see ridiculous things happen, and expect pathetic efforts, you can manage the pain a lot better.

Most Mets fans were outraged when the team got swept at home by the Phillies. We were amazed they even scored a run. While most fans are in an uproar as to the Mets inability to beat the lowly Marlins in Florida, we’re more amazed the Mets played two games so far without anyone getting injured. If you take the attitude that the loss is a given before the game even starts, you’ll enjoy the season a lot more and decrease the pain of Metsfanitus.

It reminds us of the scorpion and the turtle story:

A scorpion, who was a very bad swimmer, asked a turtle to carry him on his back and take him across the river. “Are you crazy?”, said the turtle, “you’ll sting me when I’m swimming and I’ll drown”. The scorpion responded, “if I sting you, we’ll both go down and I’ll drown too – where’s the logic in that?” The turtle thought about it, it made sense, so he decided to help the scorpion get across the river. Halfway through, the scorpion gave the turtle a deadly sting and as he sank drowning, the turtle said to the scorpion “why did you do that, it makes no sense!?” to which the scorpion says “hey, I’m a scorpion – that’s what I am, why would you expect anything different?”.

The Mets are a bad team. Accept that. To expect anything else means you’re a turtle. You can manage Metsfanitus a lot better with this kind of mindset.

So accept the pain. Embrace it even. Let it flow through your entire body until you become one with the pain Metsfanitus injects into your very being. It’s inevitable, you can’t escape it – and it will never change because the Mets organization rewards incompetence at every level, from medical staff to PR personnel to blog writers. Unless of course the owners sell the team – which, like the scorpion, makes for a very unlikely outcome).

For after all, it is only through pain that we arrive at eventual pleasure. And we hate to tell you, but that won’t be coming in 2014 either.

Related posts:

  1. Terry Collins, Super Genius
  2. Mets Fans See Best and Worst of David Wright Within 24 Hours
  3. Mets Defy Logic in Weekend Series Win Vs. Nationals
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3 Responses to Do You Suffer from Metsfanitus? Here’s How to Deal with the Pain of Watching the Mets

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